A Guide for Divorcing Parents: Remembering the Children

 Posted on December 00,0000 in Children of divorce

Divorce is prevalent in today’s world and causes children to grow up where the issue is commonplace and a major part of daily life. However, despite what may be going on behind closed doors, divorced spouses must remember to place their children ahead of all else.

The situations surrounding divorce can bring up hostility, including financial or personal hostility. And often quarreling spouses cannot cohabitate or even communicate without argument. This can cause several future problems, especially when children are caught in the middle. The following suggestions offer insight as to what should be avoided during divorce to help minimize the impact on children.

• Avoid confiding in your children. Confiding in children is a huge mistake frequently made by divorced or divorcing couples. Adults may default to their children once a spouse, who is often a primary confidant, is out of the picture. However, this places more pressure on the children and can make them feel more isolated;

• Encourage a relationship with the other spouse. It is critical to encourage children to interact with the former spouse. This can help reaffirm the bond of trust that a divorce can often damage, and it also lets children know that both parents still care;

• Avoid major changes. Although a broad reaching idea, this can incorporate major relocation and living situations, lifestyle changes, schedule conflicts, and parenting skills as a whole. For instance, do not change your disciplinary policy or house rules. Children need stability more than anything during a divorce; and

• Never hesitate to seek help when necessary. This is of paramount importance when dealing with a divorce, especially when children are involved. Not only is seeking help applicable to the children but is also applicable to you and your spouse. Hence seeking the assistance of a mental health professional is never a bad idea. A professional will be able to assess the way in which the children are handling the divorce, and assist you and your spouse to better communicate.

If you are going through a divorce in the Aurora, Illinois area, the Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C. can assist you and your children with all of your family law and divorce needs. With a decade of experience, contact Matthew M. Williams, an experienced Aurora family law attorney.