Children and Divorce: How Different Age Groups React to Separation

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Divorce

There is no one answer for how children of any age will react to their parents’ divorce, but there are common reactions that have been observed in children of different age groups. These common reactions can give you things to look for in your children when you are going through a divorce and can help you plan how to deal with these reactions.

Infants (Ages 0 to 18 Months): At this time in their lives, the child knows only the love that their parents give them by holding them and spending time with them. A divorce can impact the amount of time that a parent spends with the child, which can have negative effects on the baby. Infants can sense a lot more tension in the home than you think they can. Possible reactions to the tension can be:

• Nervousness around new people;
• Loss of appetite or change in eating habits;
• Frequent outbursts or tantrums; and
• An uneasy stomach.

Toddlers (Ages 18 Months to 3 Years): When children are toddlers, their main interactions are still with their parents, or siblings if they have them. For toddlers, change can be difficult for them. Toddlers thrive off of routine and predictability, so when their routines are changed or interrupted, they can have negative reactions. These reactions can include:

• An increase in crying or tantrums;
• Wanting more attention than normal;
• Trouble sleeping; and
• Feelings of anger.

Preschoolers (Ages 3 to 5 Years): A preschoolers are exposed more to the outside world, their level of thinking becomes more complex and their world is expanded. These children are trying to make sense of the world that they do not yet understand, so when they are in a family in which parents are going through a divorce, they probably do not understand why mommy and daddy are no longer together. Reactions during this stage can include:

• Worrying about the future;
• Nightmares;
• Feelings of responsibility about the divorce; and
• Exhibiting behaviors of younger children.

School-Aged Children (Ages 6 to 11 Years): These children are more aware of what is going on in the home and between their parents. They will most definitely be able to sense tension between their parents, which can lead to questions about the divorce and a sense of loss when one parent leaves the home. Children can react in many ways, with the most common being:

• Feelings of rejection by the parent who left the home;
• Playing sick to stay home from school;
• Feelings of anger; and
• Taking the side of one parent.

Adolescents (Ages 13 to 18 Years): These children are developing their own identities and thoughts about the world around them. They will show more awareness of what is going on around them, especially with their parents. Many teens are emotionally hurt by a divorce and often do not think divorce is an acceptable action for their parents. Reactions can include:

• Feelings of anger or hatred toward parents;
• Unpredictable behavior;
• Problems in school; and
• Feelings of loneliness.

Get in Touch with a DuPage County Divorce Attorney

Divorce changes everything, so ensuring that you have a quick and low-stress divorce is crucial for helping your children. With the help of an experienced Aurora divorce lawyer, you can be sure that you are minimizing the effects of the divorce on your children. Contact the Law Offices of Matthew M. Williams, P.C. to start the process. Call the office at 630-409-8184 to set up a consultation.

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/family-law-attorney/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201112/the-impact-divorce-young-children-and-adolescents

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-gail-gross/the-impact-of-divorce-on-children-of-different-ages_b_6820636.html

https://www.parents.com/parenting/divorce/coping/age-by-age-guide-to-what-children-understand-about-divorce/