3 Common Myths About Divorce and Children

 Posted on February 26, 2020 in Divorce

Depending on the source of statistics, anywhere between 40 and 50 percent of marriages in the United States will end in divorce. Many couples who are married also have children, and kids' well-being can be a significant cause of stress and worry for divorcing parents. Multiple studies have been conducted to determine the effects a divorce can have on kids. Psychological experts have stated that a divorce can have a significant impact on children’s lives, but it is important to realize that the impact does not have to be a negative one. There are many things you can do to ensure your children come out of the divorce in a good place. Below are a few common myths about divorce and children that can be dispelled.

Younger Children Are Not Affected By Divorce 

It has often been thought that young children do not really know what is going on during a divorce, and therefore, they are not affected as much as older children. If they cannot comprehend the situation, how can it impact them? While it is true that babies and toddlers do not really know what is happening during the divorce, that does not mean they do not feel the stress and tension that a divorce can bring. This is why it is important for parents to facilitate peacefulness and cooperation during a divorce.

Children Do Not Need to Know About the Divorce

Attempting to hide your divorce from your children is a bad idea. As previously stated, children know when something is wrong. If you are not willing to talk about your divorce with your kids, they may incorrectly internalize the family’s problems and believe they are to blame. It is important that children are informed of the divorce in age-appropriate terms and also reassured that it is not their fault.

It Is Okay for Rules to Be Different With Each Parent

After a divorce, you and your former spouse will be co-parents, meaning you agree to work together to raise your children, even though you are no longer married. In some high-conflict cases, parallel parenting is suggested rather than co-parenting, especially if an ex-spouse is completely unwilling to compromise with their former partner. However, it is highly recommended that you and your ex-spouse work together as much as possible when raising your children, because a lack of consistency between households not only sends the wrong message to your children, but it can also be difficult for your children to understand the expectations of them.

Contact a North Aurora Divorce Attorney 

If you are a parent who is considering divorce, you may be wondering how your divorce will impact your children. At the Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, we are firm believers that divorce does not have to affect your child negatively. A peaceful divorce process is possible, and your actions or behavior during the proceedings can mitigate some of the harmful aspects of your breakup. If you are concerned about your children and your divorce, you should speak with our skilled and compassionate Kane County divorce lawyers as soon as possible. Call our office today at 630-409-8184 to schedule a private consultation

Sources:

https://www.fatherly.com/parenting/myths-how-divorce-hurts-children-parents/

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-kids-will-be-just-fin_b_1247793