Holiday Child Visitation and Stress after a Divorce

 Posted on December 00,0000 in Child Custody

Every year the holidays arrive, bringing with them joy, togetherness, and stress. The stress of the holidays is felt more by some than others, but for divorced couples and their children, holiday stress may rise to new levels. The question of where the children will spend the holidays is often the source of much anxiety.

Holiday Scheduling Strategies

Sometimes during the course of divorce proceedings, parents may wish to include an annual holiday visitation schedule as part of a custody plan. However, sometimes scheduling visitation for the holidays is left to the parents. Here are few ideas that may help.

• Alternating years allows children to spend Thanksgiving, for example, with the father one year and with their mother the next.
• Alternating days, if travel time and distance permits, may allow for the children to spend Christmas Eve with one parent and Christmas Day with the other.
• Celebrate early; the calendar tells us Thanksgiving is always the fourth Thursday of November, but who says you can not enjoy a full turkey dinner with all the trimmings on the prior Saturday?

Do not let Scheduling Stress Dim your Holiday Spirit

Here are a few possible strategies for attempting to alleviate the stress around scheduling time with your children at the holidays. Each one will require some effort, but if you do your best then perhaps you might experience a little relief.

• Try to be flexible. Yes, you want time with the children, but it benefits your children if both parents wish to spend time with them.
• Try not to keep score. Arguing over the sum total of days spent with the children rarely results in anything good.
• Always remember this is about the children. They are innocent in all this so please do not use them like pawns during the holidays.
• If you decide on a schedule, keep to it. You do not want your failure to follow the plan to come back and haunt you later down the road.
• Set realistic expectations. Do not get hung up on all the bells and whistles. Just enjoy spending time with your children.

Build a Plan with Help from an Experienced DuPage County Child Custody Lawyer

Custody Plans do not always include time spent with children over the holidays. However, sometimes the framework of a schedule can ease the tension and make holidays a little less stressful.  Work with an experienced Aurora child custody and visitation lawyer to get started. The knowledgeable staff at The Law Offices of Matthew M. Williams, P.C. will answer all your questions and help set the groundwork that works best for all parties involved.

Sources:

http://www.divorcesource.com/ds/connecticut/children-divorce-and-the-holidays-2872.shtml

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jason-levoy/holidays-divorce-and-who-gets-the-children_b_8865658.html

https://www.liveabout.com/tips-for-surviving-the-holidays-while-youre-surviving-divorce-1102848